When some cheaters are asked why, they often offer the, “I am in love” excuse. They’ll admit they still love their spouse, but that they’ve “fallen in love” with this other person, too.
Sadly, if this person is also an habitual cheater, then chances are that they are not really in love with the person they’re cheating with. No, they’re in love with love. They are addicted to being in love, and they crave those feelings they experience with each new love.
Without a doubt the feelings, emotions and even physical symptoms of being in love are addicting. Sadly some people live for the feelings they get when they think about or are with the object of their love:
Those are just the ephemeral physical responses one often gets in the beginning stages of being in love. For some people, especially women, those feelings, the high, is the attractive part of being in love. It’s the fun part of being in love.
Unfortunately, a love addiction doesn’t always bode well for the success of committed relationships or marriage. Here are a few other symptoms of being a love addict:
When the cheater is married the excuse of being in love must also be justified in their mind. After all, chances are they didn’t plan on falling in love…or at least that’s what they tell themselves, so there has to be a reason why they fell in love with someone other than their spouse. You’ll notice that all too often these excuses actually blame the spouse being cheated on.
Sadly, the common thread throughout the whole idea of falling in love with someone other than your spouse is basic selfishness and immaturity. Male or female, if a person has never grown up mentally and emotionally, then being able to live out a marital commitment is almost impossible.
In fact, each of the justifications for cheating is based on pure selfishness. They are all about “my” feelings and how “I” feel. Cheaters, when looking to justify being in love as a reason for cheating on a spouse, can only focus on themselves.
They are basically incapable of considering anyone other than themselves, and because of that they also lack the ability to be honest. In addition to lying to others they end up lying to themselves about why they cheat.
Nine times out of ten after their affair causes the end of their marriage, they suddenly discover they can no longer say they’re in love. Whether they were in love because of a love of being in love or an addiction to love, they will quickly move on once again, seeking the next thrill and next high, all too often leaving pain and brokenness behind them.